


The Moon and Her Sun

by stardustsroses



Category: A Court of Thorns and Roses Series - Sarah J. Maas
Genre: ACOTAR - Freeform, ACOWAR, F/M, Fluff, Mating Bond, Nessian - Freeform, acomaf
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-14
Updated: 2018-06-14
Packaged: 2019-05-23 06:50:56
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,363
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14929301
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/stardustsroses/pseuds/stardustsroses
Summary: On a rainy day, all Nesta wants to do is stay in bed and cuddle her mate. Cassian is more than happy to oblige her. // post-bonding, post-acowar // based off this cute post that had me sobbing by @by-faelight on tumblr: https://by-faelight.tumblr.com/post/171521782299/nessian-headcanon





	The Moon and Her Sun

“Ness.”

His lips were on her skin tracing the spot where her neck met her shoulder, as light and soft as a feather. His hands were making shapes on her sides, soothing her body but making her burn, burn, and burn some more, at the same time.

“Nesta.”

The dark tips of his unbound hair caressed her cheek, and Nesta thought that he smelled of all things nice and good. As he whispered in her ear how much he loved her, how much he cared, how much he wanted her, craved her, body and soul and mind, Nesta responded by turning her face to him, so slowly, and touching her lips to him, so softly. 

And in his arms, Nesta was certain that the entirety of her body, her being, her mind, consisted of nothing but ashes and embers, flying with the wind, floating in the clouds.

She felt his tongue, warm against her own, trailing over her bottom lip, and her whole body melted into his. Nesta wanted to tell him to touch some more, take some more, take until she had nothing left to give, but her mouth found no words. Instead it found his earlobe, which Nesta took between her teeth, in the way that she knew would make his hips involuntarily rock into hers, and she needed to feel that pressure against her-

“Ness,” he whispered. “It’s time to wake up. Wake up.”

Nesta opened her eyes.

The world was made up of fluffy pillows, soft, white sheets and gentle touches – certainly not the touches she’d been dreaming about. When her senses finally came back to her, Nesta turned her head to the side, looking at an already dressed Cassian sitting by her, his hand on her back.

“What?” She rasped, hiding her face in the mountain of pillows.

His breath was warm against her ear as Cassian leaned in. “I thought you said to wake you up so we could go train in the camps.” His hand moved up and down her back in slow, soothing circles.

And Nesta heard the sound of heavy rain hitting the window, the thunder in the distance. Every fibre of her body recoiled at the thought of getting out of bed, of leaving the warmth of his body, of stepping away from his scent, forever printed on the sheets.

“No,” was all she said.

“No?” He parroted, half-amused, half-confused. “Are you feeling unwell?”

She shook her head.

“Do you not wish to leave?”

She shook her head.

“Do you want me to leave?”

Again, a shake of her head. Nesta forced her sore body to turn, to face him.

All that training in the camps…Feyre hadn’t been joking when she said Cassian wouldn’t take it easy. At the end of the day, Nesta was glad – Cassian treated her like he’d treat a fellow soldier. Not weaker. She was never weak in his eyes.

But cauldron damn her.

She could barely move.

Cassian watched her silently, his face tender, his eyes soft. Gently, he touched a piece of her hair and pulled it off her face, like he did before he kissed her.

And Nesta held out her arms. “Come here.”

He was dressed a simple white shirt and loose pants – no weaponry to be seen, no armour. Which told Nesta that her mate had shared her unwillingness to leave their little nest, too, all along, and was now happy to find in her a reason to stay.

Cassian let out a breathy laugh, leaning over her body, and nuzzling his face on her neck. Nesta closed her eyes, the feeling of his weight on top of her so comforting, that she felt like going right back to sleep. But then his wicked lips and wicked teeth were on that spot and-

“What were you dreaming about?” He purred, a wicked grin to match tugging at his lips.

Nesta opened her eyes, arms going taut around him. “What?”

And then his lips traced that spot again, his hands drifting down on her sides, fingers tracing circles over her – his – shirt, and she was reminded further of the images she’d previously seen.

Nesta cocked her head to the side, giving him a better access to her neck, and she allowed herself a grin. “How did you know?”

“I don’t need to read your mind to know,” he murmured, now leaving a trial of little gentle kisses across her collarbone. Nesta parted her lips at the feel of his teeth, his voice. “To feel what you feel. To know what you want.”

She sighed in content. “Let’s stay here today.”

“Yeah?”

She nodded. “Just me and you,” she said, pulling away to look at him. Nesta dragged her hands over his broad shoulders, letting them rest on his cheeks. She caressed the soft stubble there, provoking a smile in him. Then her fingers made their way to the locks of hair she loved so much that were now hiding his beautiful face from her, and, with incredible gentleness, she pushed them off, placing them behind his ears.

And Cassian’s heart felt too big for his chest.

He kissed the palm of her hand once, twice, letting his eyes search hers. She smiled up at him – big and wide and sleepy – and Cass thought that maybe this…maybe it wasn’t real. It couldn’t, really. Maybe he did die in the way against Hybern. Maybe it was all a dream. It felt too perfect, too good, to be anything but.

“It’s real,” she whispered.

Unspoken thoughts in his eyes that she could read as easily as if he were just another one of her books.

“How did you know?” he smiled, leading down to touch his nose to hers.

Nesta grinned. “I don’t have to read your mind to know.”

It was true. Nesta didn’t have to peek inside his mind, either, to feel what her mate felt. To know when his thoughts went back to the bloodshed, to the pain.

Cass had to stop for a moment to just look at her – his mate – and let himself feel everything she was sending down the bond to him, and let himself realize that this, what they had and the happiness they had created together, it was real and he deserved it. They both deserved it.

“It’s real,” Nesta said again, lower than a whisper, as if she was reciting a prayer to send away all his worst nightmares.

When she tilted her head to kiss him, when their lips met halfway, Cassian repeated those words to himself, silently. Those were the words on his mind as he stared at her, whenever Nesta fell asleep on his chest. Those were the words that let him sleep at night, when memories of swords gleaming scarlet and sounds of agony and despair refused to leave him.

She kissed him. So softly.

It was a kiss so sweet, so tender, so thoughtful, that it broke Cassian into a million pieces. It was a kiss that could cure all evil, push away all memories of a past that only saw bloodshed and heartbreak and loss.

It was a kiss that sent him soaring between the stars. 

“You couldn’t sleep,” she said against his lips. It wasn’t a question – but a worried statement. “Even after, you…” she trailed off, looking up at him with parted lips, cheeks painted pink.

Even after she’d woken him, startled by the anxious ruffling of his wings and his heavy breaths. Even after she’d touched his cheeks, telling him to come back to her, that she was there, she wouldn’t leave him, and it was just a dream, Cassian, just a dream. Even after she’d straddled him, her lips on his, a hand on his chest, on his erratic heart. Even after she’d undressed herself, her hand on his chin, her other guiding him into her, urging him to take and forget, to love and forget, to touch her and stay with her and forget forget forget.

Cassian looked down at her, at the clear blue eyes that now gazed upon his. And he trailed his gaze over the heat coating her cheeks. Nesta wasn’t one for embarrassment – but Cassian had to admit that every time he noticed those rose-tinted cheeks he loved to bite and kiss, his heart warmed.

And dear gods, the images those embarrassed cheeks sent to his mind…and-caldron damn him, she was still naked underneath those sheets.

He shook his head. “It’s okay,” he said, touching her cheek. “It’s okay.”

Nesta’s fingers traced his jaw, thumb caressing the corner of his mouth. Cassian kissed each one of her fingers, very, very slow. And Nesta, as she watched him, felt that pain inside her chest, that tug in her gut, that voice in her head telling her to protect him – her mate. She wanted to drive every terrible memory away. She wanted to kiss those shadows in his eyes goodbye forever.

She sat up, pulling him with her, and touched her lips to his forehead, as she’d done the night before right after he’d given her his final thrust and moan.

And Nesta smiled up at him.

Cassian’s skies were bright again.

Nobody knew this Nesta – the one that whispered sweet things in his ear in the late hours, the one that placed soft, lingering kisses atop his chest, the one that liked to bite his ears whenever she was feeling particularly playful, or whenever she wanted his undivided attention.

The Nesta that was tender, and gentle, and sweet, and playful, and soft.

The loving female under the thick warrior’s armour.

Oh, but Cass knew her – probably better than he knew himself.

“We stay, then,” he smiled.

She nodded, wrapping her arms around him, attempting to pull him close-

But then Cassian scooped her body in his arms, lifting her off the bed. Nesta held on to his neck, eyeing him suspiciously.

“What are you doing?”

Her mate only gave her a grin as he walked towards the bathroom. Nesta let out a low scoffing sound, shaking her head to herself. He placed her on the bathroom counter gently, and turned the water in the marbled bathtub.

“Will you join me?” She asked.

Cassian grabbed the salts he knew were her favourite and sprinkled them all over the bath. He loved that scent – it was so Nesta.

“How about I’ll go make breakfast whilst you bath?” He suggested.

Nesta cocked her head to the side, watching him, considering. “Will you take long?”

“Not too long.”

She smiled, stepping off the counter. Nesta clenched her teeth slightly at the soreness between her shoulder blades, the back of her thighs, her abdomen. But she still walked to him while Cassian dropped a few scented soaps that made all kind of colourful swirls in the hot water. She wrapped her arms around his torso, her lips at the back of his neck.

“Thank you,” she said.

Cassian smiled, turning to her. He took her face in his hands, placed a kiss on her forehead. “Don’t thank me, sweetheart.”

“I should be doing this for you,” Nesta said.

“No,” Cassian said with a shake of his head. “Let me take care of you for once,” he added. “Let me pamper my mate. You do more than enough for me, already.”

Nesta went silent, closing her eyes at the feel of his hands on her back, fingers gently needing her skin. It was like he knew exactly where it hurt most – like he had a direct line to her body. As if her pain was his pain.

In reality, it was.

“Cassian,” she said suddenly. “Do you wish to talk about it?”

When she opened her eyes, Cassian’s were intense, a blazing hot desert looking back at her. But his fingers kept unknotting her muscles, putting just the right pressure on her skin, and he said nothing. The bathroom was filling up with condensation that prickled at her skin, making her flushed. His hands weren’t helping.

“Cassian.”

“Nesta.”

She loved her name on his lips. “Lean on me,” she begged. “Lean on me as I have done with you.”

His fingers ceased their movements.

When his eyes searched hers, she could see every word he wanted to convey to her right there, as clear as if he were indeed speaking to her.

I will not worry you with this.

Please.

Nesta-

She got on her tiptoes, and kissed him. It was brief, just a brush of her mouth against his, and yet her skin was set on fire in an instant.

I’m here, that’s what the kiss said. That’s what her eyes said to him.

She hated it – she hated the haunted look in his eyes. She hated not knowing how to comfort him, how to help him heal, just like he had helped her.

Nesta wanted to be the person he’d look for whenever he felt that way, not spare her the words and the torment. The night before…she’d offered him an escape from it, a way to snap him back to reality, to her, and yet-

And yet Cassian refused to talk. He refused to share with her what really went on inside her mind. The pain that the memories brought him. But she felt it, still. She knew it, still. She could bear it, and that’s what she wanted him to understand. She could bear it all with him.

“I know,” he said, looking into her eyes in a way that told her he knew how to read her, too. “I know I can talk to you, sweetheart. Not…now. Not today.”

“Someday?” 

“Someday.”

Nesta sighed, placing her hand on his chest, over his heart.

“It beats for you,” he whispered. “It beats because of you.”

“I did nothing,” Nesta shook her head, the bitterness and regret of those words too true. “You survived on your own.” 

Cassian smiled then, like she didn’t understand. Like it was a secret joke she wasn’t in on. He touched her hand on his chest. “You, Nesta, saved me in more ways than one.”

She looked up at him.

“Do not ever doubt it,” he finalized.

Cassian leaned down, touching his lips to hers. Nesta melted against his body as his wings came to envelop her, as they caressed her arms, her back. She let out a breath against his lips as they opened her mouth to him, her hands coming to rest on his face.

When he pulled away – too soon for her liking – she whispered breathlessly against his jaw, “Bathe with me.”

She felt Cassian’s wings becoming tight, rigid. And she took it as a good sign.

He grinned down at her, “Nesta.”

“Why not?” Her lips attached themselves onto his collarbones, her hands moving further down.

But Cassian caught them in time. His wicked grin returned. “Because I want to be a good male to my mate, who is starving, and can barely keep herself up. Because if I take those lips one more time,” he said, leaning down, until she could feel his hot breath on her face. “If I kiss you, Nesta,” he moved his thumb over her bottom lip, and she took it between her teeth, “I’ll lift you up right now, push you against that wall.” Her lips stayed parted as he removed his thumb, as his lips touched her jaw only briefly – a phantom touch – and her eyes fluttered closed as he rasped against her ear, “And I’ll make you sore somewhere else.”

“Empty promises,” she bit back, eyes opening, challenging.

“We’ll play some other time,” he smirked, wings folding behind him. And then, with a lot more seriousness, he said, “Relax now. The hot water will help.”

And Nesta’s heart was a mess when he leaned down and touched his nose to hers. 

“I’ll be right back,” he said. 

And he left her standing in the hot bathroom, flushed and happy and frustrated.

***

He’d come back with a feast.

A whole feast.

Toast and eggs and various different meats, fruit bowls, more bread, butter and jam, some greens on the side, then she smelled a warm camomile tea and her stomach made a loud noise.

She was already in bed, a book opened in her lap, eyeing the food trays he’d proudly set on the bed with astonishment.

“Who else is coming?”

“Don’t be silly,” he smiled, slipping into the covers right next to her. Cassian handed her tea over. “You’ve been training like an Illyrian warrior – you need to eat like one.”

Nesta wondered how much love for this male could fit in her heart. He threw more and more of it each day at her.

“I can’t believe you,” she smiled with a shake of her head, leaning slightly against his shoulder. He was already munching on some toast, his own tea in hand.

“Eat,” he said. “You’re starving.”

Nesta grabbed a fruit bowl, and she looked up at him as she nibbled on a strawberry. “You say that – as if you’re sure of it. That I’m starving, I mean. Like you can feel it.”

Cassian shrugged, putting a whole piece of toast on his mouth. He wiped the crumbles off his chin as he spoke, his mouth still half-full, “Well, I can’t feel it, not really. But I’m aware of it. Even if I didn’t hear that loud grumbling,” he threw a smirk her way. “I could still sense it. Not the hunger but – the discomfort in you. It unsettles me.”

It was strange, oh-so very strange, the way they worked. Nesta had noticed it before – whenever they spent the whole day apart, usually when Cassian flew over to meet his soldiers, she’d know the moment he set foot on land. She’d know when he was getting ready to fly home – there was the expectation to see her, and hers to see him. She’d never questioned those hints, they’d felt natural.

“I woke up before you were…anxious,” she said to him. “I could not see what you were dreaming about, but I started getting cold sweats. I knew something was wrong with you before you showed any signs.”

Cassian smiled as he sipped his tea. “It’s the same with me, sweetheart. It’s our bodies’ way of knowing when either one of us is in danger. It’s like a warning signal.”

He was already devouring two eggs when Nesta said, “How did you really know what I was dreaming of this morning?”

“Besides the obvious?” He pointed at his sculpted chest mid-bite, cocking an eyebrow.

She rolled her eyes.

“You were feeling a particularly strong emotion – I sensed it. Figured it out from there.”

“Really?”

“No,” he smirked, shoving a whole fried egg onto his mouth. “You were moaning my name.”

Nesta slapped his arm, hiding her grin in her cup of tea.

The sky outside was still dark, the rain unforgiving and the wind equally merciless. Under the covers with him, warm and comforted by his presence, Nesta thought there was no other place she’d rather be.

And she had been hungry indeed – after they finished, her stomach felt full at last, and the warm bath had done wonders to her body. Cassian wrapped his arm around her, pulling her close to his side. Nesta placed her hand atop his chest, her head nestled on his shoulder.

“Do you remember,” he smiled as he twirled the curly pieces of her hair, “the first day you cooked me food?”

“I thought your eyes were going to fall out,” she said. “I am still baffled that you were not expecting me to do it.”

Cassian turned to look down at her. His grin was tender as he pushed aside some stray curls out of her eyes. “I didn’t even know you were aware of what it meant at the time. I didn’t know…well, I didn’t know you wanted it.”

“Neither did I,” she confessed. “Don’t get me wrong – the act of offering food to one another as a means of acceptance of a mating bond it’s still so stupid.”

Cassian snorted a laugh.

She smiled, looking up at him. “But I’m glad I did,” she added quietly.

Cassian turned his eyes to her, his hand clutching her waist. The smile he gave her was out of this world – easily the most beautiful thing she had ever seen. And it grew and grew, and she felt it as he touched his lips to hers. Nesta kissed him, an incredible softness to her touches, and then she nudged his wing, hinting that she wanted it wrapped around her.

Cassian obliged.

His wing pulled her closer to his body, sheltering her, and when Cass felt his mate smile against his lips, as well as the joy Nesta was sending down their bond, he felt like his heart might very well explode.

Gently, he pulled away, his lips passing over parts of her face he’d already committed to memory: her lips, each corner of her mouth, the curve of her chin. Then up, to her high cheekbones, her temples, her eyelids. Slow, soft kisses that meant to convey the calm happiness he felt at being with his mate – finally safe, finally together.

“I’m glad you did, too,” he whispered against her skin, a lingering smile still on his lips.

Nesta raised her eyes to him, a smile of her own adorning her beautiful face, and said, “You’re like the sun.”

“Hum?” He said, as she nuzzled her face on his neck.

“So warm,” she said, “You melt all the ice away. You brighten everything.”

Cassian wove his fingers through her hair, gently caressing her scalp on the way. “I’m your sun? Does that make you my moon, sweetheart?” 

He felt her smile against his skin. “If you want,” she said, pacing a gentle kiss on his neck. “The sun and the moon. They don’t have much in common, do they?”

Cassian shrugged. “I think it makes for a better love story.” 

Nesta pulled away, wrapping her hand around his torso. “You do?”

Her mate nodded. “I do,” he said. Gently, he took her free hand in his, entwining their fingers. He murmured, “My moon. I like the sound of that.”

Nesta could only watch him as he took her hand and placed a kiss on her palm with heart breaking tenderness. She had no words for him, for the love that they shared. For what she felt.

“My moon,” he repeated, so slow. Like he was playing with the sound in his mouth, like he did with her name, “who brightens up even my darkest nights.”

No words.

So Nesta took it upon herself to thank him by inching her face up to him, and placing careful, little sweet kisses on his lips. There would be time for other types of kisses later. But for now, Nesta wanted to enjoy their embrace – she wanted the soft roughness of his voice and his lips lingering on hers. She wanted her body pressed to his side and his hands gently stroking her back.

Cassian closed his eyes, sighing quietly to himself. “The universe is a funny thing.”

“Why’s that?”

He smiled, his eyes still closed. He held his mate tighter to him, his chin resting on top of her head, as he murmured, “We did get that time, after all.”

“Time,” Nesta mused. “We will never run out of time. Not you and I.”

“Are you sure that after a whole eternity with me,” said Cassian, “you won’t get tired of putting up with your mate?”

Nesta shared his amused smile, but her words were true. “No, I don’t believe that,” she said. “Forever with you will never be enough.”

“You are a romantic at heart,” he smirked, pulling away to poke her nose. “Aren’t you, Nesta Archeron?”

“Enjoy it while it lasts,” she said.

A playful glint in his eyes as he said, “I am enjoying it, indeed. You’ve made my heart flutter.”

“Stop.”

“No, you really did.”

“Are you going to kiss me or are you just going to keep speaking to my lips?”

Cassian’s eyes lifted to ears and he raised one eyebrow. Again, that wickedness in his smile made her own heart flutter in her chest, and it felt like it had stopped the minute he took her chin between two fingers and kissed her. Again, again, and again. Until she was breathless and clinging to his shirt, her lips parting for more.

Then Cassian pulled away. “Would you read it to me?”

Nesta opened her eyes, feeling dazed, and looked to where he pointed his chin – her book. “You want me to read it?”

Cassian nodded. “Is it a sexy book?”

Nesta had to laugh at the utter seriousness with which he pronounce those words. “Cassian. It’s a poetry book.”

“Does it have sexy poems?”

She hid a grin. “I haven’t gotten that far, but I suppose so.”

“Maybe when we get to those parts we can take some inspiration,” he smirked.

“Tell me you’re not serious.”

“Why not? There’s a lot we can still try. Have you ever thought about one leg on-”

“Do you want me to start or not?” She said, flushed.

Cassian shot her a teasing grin. “Go ahead, sweetheart.”

Nesta didn’t bother to hide a smile this time. She adjusted her position in her mate’s arms, comforted by his warm breath on the shell of her ear, the sound of pouring rain outside their window, and the way his hands stroked her sides, her stomach, so slowly. And Cassian watched her as she cleared her throat, pure adoration in his eyes. As his hands held her, as he memorized every breath she took, as he heard that steady heartbeat against his chest… 

Cassian felt like he didn’t have to be afraid of images of blood and gore and violence and threat in his dreams – for the moon was his companion, and no matter how dark his night skies got, she would always be there for him, to light up the way.

And so Nesta read, in a slow, calming voice that restored all peace to his world. “The Moon and her Sun.”


End file.
